[Onthebarricades] US: Massive Crime Wave Sweeps the Country

[Andy]

----- Original Message ----- 
From: Dan Clore 
Newsgroups: talk.politics.libertarian,soc.rights.human,alt.politics.libertarian,alt.activism,alt.fan.noam-chomsky,alt.anarchism,alt.society.anarchy,alt.politics.radical-left,alt.politics.socialism
To: smygo at yahoogroups.com ; secularhumanist at yahoogroups.com 
Sent: Monday, January 14, 2008 7:40 AM
Subject: [smygo] Massive Crime Wave Sweeps the Country


News & Views for Anarchists & Activists:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/smygo

http://tinyurl.com/2w3rpk
Massive Crime Wave Sweeps the Country
by Garry Reed
Wednesday, 12 December 2007

It's a nice sunny day so you decide to go anti-war protesting with your 
friends.

You will be arrested.

If you obey all the rules, demonstrate peacefully, don't trespass or 
block building entrances, or obstruct public sidewalks or impede auto 
traffic, or destroy property and don't run with scissors, you will still 
be arrested.

You may be arrested for kneeling or shrugging or leafleting or wearing a 
plain T-shirt or holding a bucket of paste.

It has become illegal in the USSA to unknowingly break unknown, 
never-before-heard-of laws while protesting war.

It will be impossible for you to know what these laws might be. The only 
way you can find out what is illegal is to simply do something and then 
see if you get arrested for it.

To help you plan your day of protesting (never leave the house without 
clean underwear) you should thoroughly familiarize yourself with the 
following true-life events, amassed from the mass media over the past 18 
months or so.

Associated Press: Police arrested demonstrators for kneeling on the 
sidewalk at a rally near the United Nations. The article never mentions 
why kneeling is illegal. So be very careful how you address an untied 
shoelace the next time you're walking along on a public sidewalk.

During the same rally, a person wearing a Bush mask was arrested. City 
councilcrats apparently sneaked a law onto the books making it illegal 
to impersonate a Republican president. President masks are commonly sold 
in party stores during Halloween. Be prepared for SWAT raids.

UPI article: A black minister was charged with disorderly conduct and 
assaulting a police officer during a Washington, D.C., protest. The 
story never identified what conduct was disorderly. Breathing while 
black, perhaps?

However, the assault charge was explained. A police officer placed his 
hands on the minister's shoulders and the minister shrugged them off. 
One can easily imagine the officer's courtroom testimony: "The 
perpetrator assaulted me with a violent shoulder shrug."

Washington Post: During an attempt by demonstrators to post signs on 
public property advertising a protest march, a woman holding a bucket of 
paste was arrested. It isn't explained how bucket-holding is threatening 
to civic tranquility.

Ah, but Agence France-Presse reports the rest of the story: Washington 
citycrats claimed the posters were stuck up with adhesives that didn't 
meet city code, while the protesters were there specifically to prove 
that their paste was legal.

So what was the bucket-holder charged with? Possession of a bonding 
agent with intent to apply?

>From an anti-war Web site: Two activists wearing T-shirts that read 
"Iraq Veterans Against the War" approached Fort Benning gate guards to 
ask about access. They were promptly handcuffed and arrested. A third 
activist removed his politically incorrect T-shirt and replaced it with 
a plain T-shirt. He approached the Fort Benning gate guards to ask about 
access. He was promptly handcuffed and arrested.

Moral: Gate guards will not tolerate T-shirts.

CBS Chicago: Six anti-war activists were arrested for passing out 
leaflets during a food fair in a city park. No further explanation was 
offered. Is leafleting illegal in Chicago? Were they guilty of 
leafleting without a hall pass? Were they charged with possession of 
leaflets with intent to distribute? Coercive leafleting? Threatening to 
paper-cut someone?

After conducting exhaustive professional Googling for this article, no 
evidence could be found indicating that a single pro-war demonstrator 
has ever been arrested. There are two possible explanations for this: 
(1) Pro-war demonstrators are absolute models of law-abiding 
citizendroids, or (2) Nobody ever, in history, in any country, gets 
arrested for supporting a sitting president's pet war.

A final note: You will now be arrested for reading this subversive 
libertarian screed.

Sorry about that. Hope you're wearing clean underwear.

More of Garry Reed's writing can be found at (http://www.freecannon.com ).

-- 
Dan Clore

My collected fiction: _The Unspeakable and Others_
http://tinyurl.com/3akhhr
Lord Weÿrdgliffe & Necronomicon Page:
http://tinyurl.com/292yz9
News & Views for Anarchists & Activists:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/smygo

Skipper: Professor, will you tell these people who is
in charge on this island?
Professor: Why, no one.
Skipper: No one?
Thurston Howell III: No one? Good heavens, this is anarchy!
-- _Gilligan's Island_, episode #6, "President Gilligan"



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